Addiction Resources

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Mike Hupfer introduces Detox Sector. Detox Sector provides resources for help overcoming addiction. When I was young, I started drinking to numb my emotions. I continued abusing alcohol for many years. With some help and hard work, I've been sober for 13 years.

Recovery is a journey and each person’s path is unique. Healing and transformation is absolutely possible. Listed below are some suggested readings and strategies that people can use to help overcome addiction.

1. Seeking Help: People find success by reaching out to addiction specialists, therapists and counselors. These professionals may help provide guidance, coping strategies, treatment plans and emotional support.
2. Support Networks: Building a strong support system can be beneficial. Connecting with other people who have faced similar challenges can be empowering and help forge a sense of togetherness.
3. Education and Awareness: Understanding the nature of addiction is important. Education can help individuals make better informed decisions and apply what we learned to help motivate and move forward.
4. Self-Reflection: Acknowledging the problem and accepting responsibility are important steps. Examining the root cause of addiction and identifying the triggers is helpful.
5. Healthy Coping Mechanisms: Replacing destructive and harmful habits with healthier coping strategies and alternatives is important. This might involve engaging in creative pursuits or exploring other positive outlets.
6. Lifestyle Changes: Overcoming addiction requires significant lifestyle changes. Making changes in daily routines, social circles and environments is vital.

• Born To Win by Muriel James and Dorothy Jongeward 
• Memoir of a Broken Child by Mike Hupfer 
• Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by David D. Burns 
• Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships by Eric Berne 
• Getting Sober: A Practical Guide to Making it through the first 30 Days by Kelly Madigan Erlandson 

• Homecoming: Reclaiming and Healing Your Inner Child by John Bradshaw 
• I’m Ok - You’re Ok by Thomas A. Harris 
• Meditations by Marcus Aurelius
• Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel by Changing the Way You Think by Dennis Greenberger
• Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse
• The Hero Within: Six Archetypes We Live By written by Carol Pearson

Mike Hupfer presents Cognitive Behavior Therapy. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is a tool that I have found to be extremely helpful. Aaron Beck, MD., facilitated its movement over half a century ago. CBT may sound complicated, and esoteric, but it’s really straightforward. In essence, we can help shape, and influence how we feel, and subsequently, how we act too.

The behavior chain, given as an example below, may help illuminate it a bit. The behavior chain is a very effective tool in CBT therapy that helps one to identify how thoughts influence one’s behaviors. Every life’s action, like a movie script, can be broken down into four basic components: (1) situation (2) thoughts (3) feelings (4) behavior.

CBT basic components: (1) situation (2) thoughts (3) feelings (4) behavior

The behavior chain starts with a (1) situation. It can be any situation. The next part of the behavior chain is the (2) thoughts section. Our initial thoughts tend to be negative.

When we are able to identify the initial negative thoughts, and replace them with more positive thoughts, our (3) feelings, and subsequent (4) behavior, are more likely to be grounded and centered. The key is to identify, and challenge the initial negative thoughts.

We can use behavior chains to review past situations, and to plan for upcoming situations (weddings, reunions, birthdays, etc.). To illustrate, we will use the example of driving in traffic, to get to work, when "somebody cuts us off and flips us the bird.”

CBT basic components:  (1) situation (2) thoughts (3) feelings (4) behavior

(1) Situation: Somebody cuts us off and flips us the bird.

(2) Thoughts: Initial negative: “Why that SOB” OR more positive: “Who cares.”

(3) Feelings: Thoughts create feelings pissed off/agitated (initial negative) OR less anxious (thinking something more positive).

(4) Behavior: Can Lead To snapping at co-workers (negative flow) OR be nicer to them (positive thought flow)

You can see how outside actions beyond our control can influence both our thinking and behavioral patterns. By understanding these concepts through CBT one can make better decisions that can have a better, more positive impact on both ourselves and others as well.

CBT Core Components

Sometimes, our thoughts are misshapen, and weighted toward the negative end of the teeter totter. By challenging the negative thoughts, we may be better able to feel, and act differently.

CBT Core Beliefs

People believe core beliefs very strongly, even “feel” it to be true. Yet, it might be mostly, or entirely untrue. A person can use a variety of strategies to challenge the idea, so a person can view themselves in a more realistic way.

CBT Coping Skills

Another component of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is developing useful coping skills. Ideally through therapy, the professional will help an individual by teaching coping strategies. These coping strategies may be used to help deal with high-risk situations.

All these core beliefs are really just thoughts and ideas.

1. It's just an idea and not necessarily the truth. 

2. It's an idea and can be challenged.

3. It's an idea that needs to be maintained through “select data.” 

4. It may have begun in childhood.

Parent Adult Child

(P)

Mike Hupfer presents PAC. The “Parent” is a sum total of what we have learned from others when we were kids especially caretakers, teachers, etc. This has a big impact on how we view others and the world around us since most of this has been integrated within us through learned behavior that has been taught to us in some regard.

(A)

The “Adult” in the Transactional Analysis is important, because the “Adult” is the kind, and objective coach, who plays mediator for two forces between the parent and child within us, who most of the time, are at opposite ends of the teeter totter. The purpose of the Adult state is to examine and question thoughts and feelings from both the child and the parent part of us and to form an educated conclusion. In essence, it is to be a critical thinker.

(C)

Our personality lives in the “Child,” and deals with emotions, so this piece is important. If you find a joke funny and you start to laugh uncontrollably, most likely this is the child part of us letting go and having fun.

Parent ~ Adult ~ Child II

Picture the parent, adult and child, as big stores inside your brain's mega mall. Malls are on the endangered species list, but that’s another story. The cheese in the Wisconsin water has bolstered my creativity, so I will use the terms parent store, adult store, and child store, when referring to the individual components of the PAC.

The parent store has two departments: the nurturing parent and the critical parent. The nurturing parent and the critical feedback come from many sources: our mother/fathers, educators, relatives, etc. As children, we generally want to please these folks, and will conform to gain approval. In essence, children adapt, to not be cast out.

The child store has two departments: the free child and the adapted child. The free child is the mountain spring source of our creativity, spontaneity, and personality. To obtain conditional approval from others, kids learn to adapt. Problems may surface later in life, when the free child is buried deep, and screaming to be set free.

Parent ~ Adult ~ Child III

Picture the parent, adult, and child, as residing within yourself. Each has a separate part and function of what makes up your personality.

(P) 

The parent part has two components: the nurturing parent and the critical parent. The nurturing and the critical feedback is influenced by many people during our childhood such as parents, educators, relatives, etc. As children, we generally want to please these folks, and will conform to gain approval. In essence, children adapt, to not be cast out and to feel accepted.

(A)

The adult component is a function all on its own, and is vital to the overall operations of both the Child ego state and the Parent ego state. It makes decisions based on facts and is influenced by both the Parent and Child ego state. The purpose of the Adult state is to examine and question thoughts and feelings from both the Child and Parent ego states and form an educated conclusion. In essence, it is to be a critical thinker. 

(C) 

The child part of the PAC model has two main components: the free child and the adapted child. The free child is the mountain spring source of our creativity, spontaneity, and personality. To obtain conditional approval from others, kids learn to adapt.

Parent ~ Adult ~ Child IV

Problems may surface later in life, when the free child is buried deep, and screaming to be set free. The free child does not like the perpetually critical parent, but will comply, albeit grudgingly. As we grow older, the experience is a series of internal, cerebral conflicts, between the screaming, free child, and the always critical parent. A great example of this conflict is a person who is passive aggressive. On the surface, the adapted child is complying, but the screaming, free child, exacts revenge in the end. This could be in the form of something like giving someone the silent treatment or continually putting off responsibilities. 

The adult intervenes by taking inventory of both the Child and Parent ego states so that the Parent component can make a more conscious, balanced decision, independently. At all times, the Adult ego state has the child’s best interest. The Adult balances discipline and direction, with freedom for our kid to be a free child. As we grow older, and move through life’s trials and tribulations, many of our contemporaries may lose some pizzazz, like they are missing pieces of their personality. 

It is likely their free child is buried, screaming for rescue. I recommend John Bradshaw's book "Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child."